im sorry

I was thinking yesterday about how i treat people and how it needs to change. i examened my life, and this is what i got.

I lie.

I cheat.

I use people.

I put people down to make myself feel better.

I use manipulation as a second language. I actually like using it to get what i want. I used it on sam because he got mad at me so i manipulated him and he asked me out again just for me to say no again.

I have friends that i hate. i just keep them around because i am scared to end up alone in high school like i did in middle school.

i talk shit about everyone.

i talk about people behind their back.

i stab people in the back to get farther in life. and they still don’t know

i have a friend erika i only became her friend so that i could steal her away from a friend that i hate right now i used to hate erika, now we are best friends or so she thinks.

It makes me happy when i think of all the people i manipulate and it works.

now that that is all out of the way. now that i have cut myself open completly i can be honest with you and myself and change for the better. what happened to me i didn't used to be this way?

i am ugly.

on the inside